i asked first comebacks i asked first comebacks

I'm Sergios Rotar, a 21 years old personal development enthusiast. That hurt almost as much as looking at your face. "Did you parents and friends love you, no". I guess thats why theyre so mad. 1. These comebacks are best for those situations where you dont just want to insult someoneyou want to own the room. Is your urge to reply didnt ask to things that never concerned you an egotistical thing? IN CONNECTICUT, DEAR ABBY: When Im asked how old I am, I answer, When I was born, the rainbow was black and white. NOT YOUR BUSINESS IN KANSAS, DEAR ABBY: I once received a birthday card that dealt with the issue perfectly. My friend is up and Im the insultee and, without hesitation, she says, Your teeth arent as white as they could be! I was flabbergasted. But I understand its not that simple for everyone. 23. Whether youre dealing with a know-it-all friend or a rude coworker, weve got you covered. Here is a list of other comebacks to use whenever. She always answered, Im old enough to have a past and young enough to have a future. She was still saying this past her 100th birthday. Me neither. whats a good comeback when someone says "i asked you first"? I think you might be overestimating your importance here. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. If you need to go full stealth-mode, here are 16 compliments you dont realize are actually pretty insulting. 42. 4. First, theyll likely ask why youre wondering. It can be disconcerting to realize that a penguin might have more refined culinary tastes than ones own. Witty comebacks that show off the smarty pants in you. And yet your ignorance still demanded an answer, amazing! and the immediately talk to somebody else without giving them time to respond to it. RELATED:30 Perfect Comebacks To Use When Someone Calls You Fat. WebSavage Comebacks You should come with a warning label. Here are some hall of fame insults heard by the people of, The Best Outfits From Daisy Jones And The Six That Make Me Wish It Was1975, How To Stop Stressing Over YourRelationships, 11 Gaslighting Phrases Used by Narcissists And Powerful Responses To Shut ThemDown, The Best Dating Sites and Apps: Complete List of the Top Online DatingPlatforms, 50+ Classic Rock Trivia Questions ForMusicians. Your support helps us deliver the news that matters most. They're the best burn jokes you'll find. 37. These comebacks are light enough that the person will still be speaking to you afterwards, yet give you peace of mind as you "judo" thei Article by I should have said - Verbal Self Defense Made Easy. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. comebacks: No, but you to much of a dumb fuck to know so i have to tell you comeback: We have to ask for opinions now? Well, the jerk store called and theyre running out of you. George Constanza of Seinfeld dropped this epic line. By Jill Zwarensteyn Written on Mar 22, 2022. 200. Web82. Youre the reason that toothpaste tubes have instructions on them. She would say, Can you keep a secret? When the person would reply with Yes, I can, she would then say, So can I! That was usually the end of the conversation. If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be healing the world. 34. Because she didn't 'ask' for a disrespectful midgetwit to be the next in her family tree. Ill have to remember that the next time Im looking for a stupid opinion. Now that you mention it, that kind of reminds me to empty the compost, too. Im not insulting you. Assistant Food Editor Danielle Dorsey has put together a mapped guide to the best places to eat and drink in L.A. right now, collected from the writing of Foods Bill Addison, Stephanie Breijo and Jenn Harris. 6. Hilarious Comebacks You'll Wish You Knew Before - Reader's Id give you a nasty look but you already have one. When shes not writing articles about useful facts and pop culture, you can find Erin enjoying the local theater scene and working toward her goal of reading 50 books a year. In this blog post, well be uncovering 55 of the most savage comebacks for any and all arguments that will help put an end to any debate faster than you can say goodbye. HA-HA-HA And I thought my jokes were bad. Im sorry you were offended when I called you a h*e. I didnt know it was a secret. And I didnt ask for a response, but you still gave one. Press J to jump to the feed. I would remind them that I don't need anyone's permission to talk. I'd tell them to keep their conversations to themselves if they don't want to he Thank you for your reply. Laurie Ochoa is general manager of Food at the Los Angeles Times. This story has been shared 104,824 times. not really good as they can always pull a "damn that's a lot of words. 1.1k. James Michener and Thor Heyerdahl cashed in on 50s tiki-mania; so did Trader Vic and Don the Beachcomber.. Have you ever been in a situation where the person standing in front of you has just remarked about your hair, clothes, or appearance, and you had nothing clever or out of the ordinary to say back? Here are some of our favorite savage comebacks to use in an argument: Im not a proctologist, but I can spot an ass when I see one. DEAR ABBY: In response to Ageless Lady in Washington (Oct. 8), who sought a retort to people who ask her age, I had an aunt who refused to divulge her age. While some comebacks are simply witty one-liners, others require quick-thinking and sharp wit to come up with an effective response on the spot. 10. Id give you a nasty look, but you already have one. You lips keep moving, but all I hear is "blah, blah, blah. Anyway, the guy finally interrupts her to say I AM NOT A PEDOPHILE, SO STOP ACTING LIKE A GODDAMN CHILD!, 10. "The older I get the less surprised I think I'd be if a random body part just fell off one day." You could be nice and simply say, "I don't have a strong view one way or the other." Sort by. Shhhh, the adults are talking, so please keep quiet. With that said, use these comeback ideas sparingly and only in situations where you feel comfortable doing so. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. Is it grammatically correct to say "He is having cough, sneezing and headache"? You almost Regularly-updated list of Comeback insults and Comeback comebacks, sorted by latest, highest rated, and random. Did it come with a pole? Ouch. 9. Im Laurie Ochoa, general manager of L.A. Times Food, with this weeks Tasting Notes. Use this comeback if someone says something mean to you. Gr8AuntCarolyn. What does "twin" mean in the phrase "the twin shocks of Vietnam and Watergate"? Here are some groan-worthy jokes you cant help but laugh at. I had a wet dream about you. Of the 16 chocolate chip cookie characteristics presented in the reader survey, Julie wrote in this weeks story with the results, 82% of respondents said that chewiness is the most important. 99% Upvoted. We've all been there: knowing the best comebacks to say after the argument is over. 20 Something 20 Somethings 30 Somethings after dark best comebacks Burns Comebacks Comedy digs Funny genius responses Hilarious how to respond humiliate Humor Insults Jokes laugh on demand laugh out loud lol Love and Relationships Offensive One-Liners Relationships Relationships & Dating roast STFU what to say Zingers The point being of course that whatever they have asked is none of their business. One of the, One day in middle school my friends and I were all coincidentally wearing either pink or yellow shirts. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. When the Indian coach was asked whether stand-in captain Ajinkya Rahane is a bowling captain, he went on to mention that he was hearing it for the first time. Its the circus. It looks just like a penis only smaller. And kept on laughing. Hold still. Climb back in your mum and cook a little longer. In a dumb criminals book: A flasher came in to a laundromat and exposed himself. I dont need anyones permission to post my opinion. Apparently, they have a vacancy in clownery they think youd be suited for. Knocks em dead every time. Bitch Im TELLING you dc if you asked or not. And is adaptable to just about any jab thrown your way. Thats an interesting point of view. Yes, I know. I thought I heard someone who actually knows what theyre talking about. Favorite Answer. 6. i love this thank you for this there is a bully at my park i am writing this all down now. And if youre not sure whether your comeback is savage enough, its better for you to not use it. Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone. This one comes from Dorothy Parker who was the queen of good comebacks. 2. Im not a proctologist, but I can spot an ass when I see one. 13. I often share my opinions, and people say, Did I ask?. We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer) as we strive to provide site experiences for browsers that support new web standards and security practices. 8. If the topic is relevant to something that they are interested in, or if it's important enough that they should care about it, tell them how. You could say "And?" Are you ready to hop in that garbage can? See additional information. 84. WebIf somebody said I didnt ask you, in response to something Id said, Id respond one of the following ways (depends on mood and moment): Prompt: I didnt ask you.. ", Sent this to my gf without reading it Im so fucked rn. Im sorry, were you dropped on your head as a child? 32. 27. This thread is archived. Best Comebacks for when You're Being Hit on: (Your reaction) Thank you! The first response made me nod my head instinctively. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. They were refusing to eat saba mackerel after cost-cutting measures forced their minders to stop buying pricier horse mackerel. However, theres nothing wrong with spending a little time thinking of a savage comeback ahead of time. too bad I didn't read it.". Heres a clip of the mackerel being cooked to the sounds of the shows unforgettable theme song to whet your appetite. Ouch. You might like: 27+ Unique Witty Comebacks for Shut Up Whats the Best Reply? 9. Prior to this, she was part of a two-year Hearst fellowship program where she covered crime and education in suburban Connecticut. Lmao i got a 9 year old who said ok but who asked this seems a lil too aggressive. Theres nothing quite like the satisfaction of firing off a savage comeback, especially when it leaves your adversary reeling. this is for my brother who never shuts up and i just wanna make him feel stupid. RELATED:99 Sarcastic & Funny Memes About Life. Time to take you back to the enclosure now. I have neither the time nor the crayons to explain it to you is another great one to keep in your pocket when someone is being willfully ignorant. 27+ Savage Comebacks when Someone Insults You. Its not that the food was so good, but it did what a theme restaurant is supposed to do transport its customers to a different time or place and allow them to briefly trade real life for a fantasy life. Me: Singing along to Fleetwood Mac. Do you want good comebacks? So for her sake and your ancestors' sake and for my sake don't ever fucking again sarcastically ask "who tf asked". You have the moral backbone of a chocolate eclair. And thats something to be proud of. We recommend our users to update the browser. Dont worry about me. I think you owe it an apology. 2023byTango Publishing Corporation All Rights Reserved. You can sign in to vote the answer. Why not take today off? Response: First, this comeback was a 'Korea' comeback, not a 'US' comeback. Still, it wasnt until a U.S. However, if you want to get out of a heated conversation with dignity intact, saying the right thing can make all the difference. Your so fat you need cheat codes to play Wii fit. Youre so ugly, you couldnt even arouse suspicion. January graduated with an English and Literature degree from Columbia University. But Ill keep trying, is an annihilating one-two punch. 23 Perfect Sassy Comebacks You Need In Your Life. (Security Pacific National Bank Collection / Los Angeles Public Library). I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. comeback: Ok, dont want my opinion bye (walks away) Im very skinny and my arms are noodles so my friend told me, You look like Steve Rogers without the serum.. With a little quick thinking, you can turn it into a savage comeback. I enjoy sharing it when the opportunity arises: Im the same age as my tongue, and a little older than my teeth. I enjoy the look of puzzlement it creates. I heard a kid tell one of his classmates that they smell like hot dog water,' shares one Buzzfeed contributor. Youre twice the d*ck you were yesterday. Plus, Harris eats at Bar Chelou and Le Chateau de Tien Tao, two places that are establishing Pasadena as a newly revitalized culinary destination. You could be nice and simply say, "I don't have a strong view one way or the other." Luckily, I have compiled a short list of all the things I could say, if he annoys me. You can still go to Tiki-Ti on Sunset Boulevard and Damons steakhouse in Glendale for a glimpse of the tiki era, but at the time, Bahookas was one of my favorite places to go with Jonathan, who had a collection of Hawaiian shirts that he wore like a uniform (before he switched to Brooks Brothers shirts and suspenders). I've been in a lot of situations where I say something and someone says "did I ask" and I don't know how to respond. Whatever you do, dont let an insult get the best of you. He considers whether the steampunk restaurants arrival is a sign, as Martens writes, that the themed restaurant, which enjoyed an era of expansion throughout the 1980s and 90s with the Hard Rock Cafe, Planet Hollywood and many more, is ready for a proper comeback.. 25. RELATED: Adults Find These 180+ Jokes For Kids To Be Freaking Hilarious. When a big-time lawyer rolls up on Erin Brockovich and blatantly challenges Brockovichs knowledge and abilities, Julia Roberts character is quick to set her straight. Why dont you slip into something more comfortable, like a coma? How do you think about the answers? Ok. (and then continuing usually does the trick). I wont let some food snob penguins shame me into not eating saba, one of my favorite sushi orders. You keep thinking to yourself, "Why didn't I say that!?" Says the person who cant even spell their own name. Oh! "-1,348. Feel free to keep your mouth shut instead. Perhaps you should eat make-up to look good on the inside as well. Were you trying to insult me? RELATED:These 6 Personality Types Always Need To Have The Last Word And Win Every Argument. The Trinity Presbyterian girls won their first AHSAA basketball state championship in a 52-48 late comeback win over Clements in the 3A title game. She writes about astrology, games, love, relationships, and entertainment. It started in October when Julie went through our archives and tested nine different chocolate chip cookie recipes from many sources, including Clementines Annie Miller, Sycamore Kitchens Karen Hatfield and former Times Food editor Amy Scattergood. Sorry for the mean, accurate thing I said. Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realize that you're an expert on my life and how I should live it. Your face is fine but well have to put a bag over that personality. We would disintegrate on the spot if someone said this to us. Know your place. Composite Deck Railing Kits Home Depot, By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. Does your ass ever get jealous of all the crap that comes out of your mouth. Hi! I hope your day is just as pleasant as you are. 196.Life is full of disappointments, just ask your parents. Here is my list of comebacks, just so youre always prepared. When Chevy Chase hosted SNL during season 2, he got into a fight with Bill Murray. 10. His arresting officer claims You are without a doubt the worst pirate Ive ever heard of. Ah, replies Sparrow, But you have heard of me. There is no comeback like one that tosses your opponents words back at them! And I know what youre going to reply with, or at least what your first instinct is. Watch popular content from the following creators: factz4youxx(@factz4youxx), If you keep talking, Im going to assume youre in desperate need of a dictionary. What do you think? After all, its always better to walk away from a fight than to get caught up in one. We, Yahoo, are part of the Yahoo family of brands. Proceed with caution and be sure to carry a mic with you when using these, because you'll definitely need to drop it after. (Stare them for a few seconds and continue with your story). I love your outfit. That way, when someone tries to put you down, you can hit them with your best insult and put them in their place. Can I ask you a question? You arent worth the dust that the wind is blowing on your face. 17 Funny Things to Say to a Narcissist and Leave Them Speechless! Designed and Developed by BriygeDesign, Dont Know How to Respond? If you do not want us and our partners to use cookies and personal data for these additional purposes, click 'Reject all'. The next two highest-ranking characteristics were with a hint of salt (68%) and gooey (65%). Try the recipe Julie came up with and let us know on our @latimesfood Instagram account what you think and if you have a better recipe. "Did you parents ask for you, no". You realise I could just say didnt ask back to your comment and it would actually carry way more weight because your comment was directed towards me, while mine was not directed towards you? Tread carefully with this one, friends! Keep in mind to not use these against someone who cant take a joke. 5. Overview of all the good comebacks #1. Actor Theo Rossi enjoys some olives at Bavel on his Middle Eastern restaurant crawl around Los Angeles. Best Comebacks Ever Funny Insults And Comebacks Snappy Comebacks Clever Comebacks Funny Comebacks Savage Comebacks Comebacks Sassy Sassy Quotes Sarcastic Quotes. Take a look at these awesome comebacks for bullies! 16. Next time he tries to bring you down with a hurtful comment, youll be ready. Before answering that question, he looks back at Southern Californias theme restaurant past, from the questionable Jail Cafe in which diners in the 1920s ate in a cell and ordered from waiters dressed as convicts to Steven Spielberg and Jeffrey Katzenbergs DIVE! There are over 7 billion people on the planet, and God chose you to be the biggest fool. There's no universal comeback, because sometimes they're correct that some information you've offered is irrelevant to the conversation, or that they don't want to talk about a topic, period. I often share my opinions, and people say, Did I ask?. You may not feel confident in your comebacks at first, but with practice, youll be able to shut down anyone who dares insult you. The key is to think quickly and to put a clever spin on the insult so that it works in your favor. "Here's another unsolicited fact: Most dumb people don't even know they're dumb.". Does this new robot-staffed chocolate emporium signal a themed restaurant comeback? Ignore them. Well, I would agree with you, but then wed both be wrong. A gross guy at a bar blurted out What ARE you? referring to my ethnic ambiguity, shared one Buzzfeed contributor, I ignored him and walked away with my friends, but what I shouldve said was Out of your league. The list below has a comeback for practically every situation you could possibly run into from the jerk boyfriend and the fake friend to the helicopter parent and the nosy neighbor. And if this one doesnt do it for you, weve got plenty of pirate jokes on deck. The good thing here is that we have 100 amazing, nasty, sarcastic, hilarious comebacks that you can use for just [] If you dont like me, acquire some taste. This one is applicable to many scenarios, so youll want to memorize italong with these 40 funny sayings worth committing to memory. Thats pretty funny! Julie Giuffrida, who is the queen of recipe archives at L.A. Times Food, has been on a months-long quest to come up with the ultimate chocolate chip cookie recipe. Good job. report. Search for: Menu Close. Recommended Reviews. We all have to deal with crazy family, nosy individuals or people who offer up unsolicited advice. You bring everyone a lot of joywhen you leave the room. This one goes left then right then left again, salting the wound. RELATED:75 Best Sassy Savage Quotes For When You're In A Mood. @2020 - All Right Reserved. When we sipped from the two long straws that came with the flaming honey bowl, a blue concoction served in what in a different restaurant might have been a salad bowl, with a sterno-fueled flame placed like a giant crouton in the middle, we could practically feel the tropical heat or was it just the humidity generated from all of the restaurants live fish tanks? 7. 29. If you spoke your mind, you'd be speechless. Remember when I asked for your opinion? If laughter is medicine, your face must be curing the world. Unless your name is Google, dont act like you know everything. best. Ill never forget the first time we met. Some babies were dropped on their heads, but you were clearly thrown against a wall. B*tch, please, your vagina has been used more times than Google. With any luck, theyll think twice before trying to mess with you again. 31. 15. Because guess what fucker, no one asked for you to say that, and unlike me, no one respects you. Somewhere out there, a tree is tirelessly producing oxygen for you. So, thanks to you again! You got me there.. One of the two of us is dumber than me. Do you think the universe revolves around you? 14. And Stephanie Breijo talks with the creative forces behind the beloved sandwich shop Wax Paper about their highly anticipated new restaurant Lingua Franca, a New California comfort food spot nearly six years in the making.. Its the tiki-theme restaurant era, however, that resonates the most for me. [Read: How to learn to be witty and win over everyone in the room] #1 If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be She graduated from Emerson College and spent part of her undergraduate career writing for the Boston Globe. If I wanted to hear from an asshole, all I had to do was to fart. This is another witty comeback that works great because it is attacking the size of the d you were just offered to suck. If you want to keep the giggles going, check out these hilarious photos that will make you laugh out loud. Or you could say did I fucking stutter. Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory. Thanks for contacting us. WebAnswer (1 of 9): Guy: Did I ask? Its so small. "No." Out of everything posted here, I think this is the most universal. Youre not that pretty to be this stupid. Youre like the first slice of bread in the packet, everyone touches you but no one wants you. WebFunny comebacks thatll leave everyone in splits The following responses dont require wit, but do require a funny bone. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. 44. Read Comeback 3 from the story Comebacks by owliell (Owl) with 8,157 reads. Do you feel that young people today rely too much on having screen time with friends instead of actually meeting up and talking face to face? Youre the reason nobody likes you. OK, maybe a little harsh. I am sorry. 199. We got into a fight with a random girl at the park, and when we were walking away she screamed after us, What are you gonna do, strawberry lemonade?, We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer), 22 insults from Shakespeare that still sting to this day, funny political quotes and insults you cant help but laugh at, 11 words and phrases that used to be insultsand are now compliments, 16 compliments you dont realize are actually pretty insulting, 40 funny sayings worth committing to memory, 50 cheesy pickup lines guaranteed to get a laugh, hilarious photos that will make you laugh out loud, 21 anti-jokes you cant help but laugh at anyway, groan-worthy jokes you cant help but laugh at, funny jokes to defuse awkward situations at work, movies with the best one-liners youll want to say over and over, Do Not Sell My Personal Information CA Residents. Others most certainly do not. You have your entire life to be a jerk. 5. Maybe follow it up with one of these funny jokes to defuse awkward situations at work. She would say to anyone inquiring, Ill excuse you for asking, if youll excuse me for not answering. JANE M. IN FLORIDA. I may not be perfect, but at least Im not you. You cant see the f*ck you in my smile, can you? I would slap you, but that would be animal abuse. You have your entire life to be a jerk. Heres a tissue. If someone asks too many Whys, then ask them WHY NOT? Two things will be certain if this is your answer to all the WHYs. 1. You will know what th What do I say to get them to loose any respect they ever had. You don't remember who I am? 32+ Witty Comebacks for Who Asked, Did I Ask, Nobody Asked etc. If d*cks could fly, your mouth would be an airport. Isn't it natural for Korean comebacks to be held in Korea? The Sovereign Lord is my strength! I hope your fingers change into fishing hooks, and you get an itch in your balls. If a guy asks you where you've been all his life, simply say, "Living mine." Of course I didnt come here to insult you I dont need to be NEAR you to insult you. Your so fat you could sell shade. RITA W. IN NORTH CAROLINA, DEAR ABBY: Something I heard in a TV commercial would be a perfect response to what Ageless considers a rude question: Age is just a number. 995 Good Comebacks. Here are some cool examples of the same that are bound to make you break into a smile. Ive been called worse things by better men. Pierre Trudeau, a Canadian politician, upon hearing Richard Nixon insulted him. I'm sorry, did you not get the memo? It's states, and I quote 'ask in one hand and shit in the other which one you think you'll fully grasp first (also from Reddit user). First of all By Julia Pugachevsky. You wanna sex-related joke? ", Then you just get flamed for having an outburst or a TL;DR. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? This exchange happened accidentally between me and my boyfriend the other day and its been legendary for us ever since: After making an honest mistake he said, Sorry Im an idiot. And I, wanting to reassure him but failing miserably, replied, Dont be sorry for who you are! You gain or lose absolutely nothing by reading my comment, except for a bit of time. Restaurant critic Bill Addison describes an epiphany he had at Saltie Girl in Boston five years ago when the restaurants impressive selection of tinned fish revealed just how delicious canned sardines and more could be. You look like a video game character whose face hasnt loaded all the way yet. DEAR JANE: That was a classic Dear Abby retort from many years ago, and one I have also recommended. Oh, Im sorry, I must have mistaken you for someone who actually knows what theyre talking about. When I first grew my hair out in high school, someone said to me: Did your barber die?, 41. I'll never forget the first time we met. 35. (edited by VopretNull) DIANNE H. IN THE SOUTH, DEAR ABBY: I think its time we stopped behaving as if getting to be a certain age, particularly as women, is something to hide. So stfu. This one is even better if you have a real bag to use as a prop. And I know what you're going to say right after I finish sending this hammer of logic straight to your senses, you miserable little fucktwat, you're going to say "who tf asked?"